Me: Cruel, unkind, spiteful, or malicious, Selfish in a petty way.

Sometimes I think that I am a really mean person. And it's being mean unknowingly. Words just come out without much thoughts. Or perhaps with great thoughts to entertain myself and a few others, but at the expense of a poor soul. After reading an entry on someone's blog, I thought I should reflect on my mean behaviour. For example, I can be really mean to my parents at home. I talk loudly to them, brush them off when they have something to say, and refuse to spare sometime to get interested in what they are talking. I think those are really mean things that I shouldn't have done. Of course mean things can be in the form of sarcasm I hurl at people. The more angry I, the more I strive to be witty and mean. I still remember writing those meanie emails to people who just don't really care what they are doing and not telling them directly in their face. I guess its unfair for me to always judge people with the same measurements of priorities and responsibilities, as well as expecting same opinions as me. And when I do a nasty thing like complaining against someone, perhaps I should spare him the sarcasm (yah, that incident with our dear mr sxxxh, oops there I go again..). But of coz, no qualm bout the complain. For the fairness to everyone, sometimes we have to be a lil' mean. Doesn't mean that when most things in the world is unfair, its okay to shrug off your duties to your teammates right? Living up to the name of complain-kings and queens of singapore, it is another incident to reminisce next time we meet up after graduation, heh heh. And of coz, there were also times when I said mean things about people behind their backs. Not really backstabbing or anything. But rather, sharing some experience about somebody, between a couple of friends, as a kind of joke. Yeah, thats really mean, and I feel bad now for the things I said. But hey, I wasn't lying or anything, those were facts! =P "Harmless gossips for laughter". So people, please keep those stories to yourself. oh-oh, aiya please don't start thinking whether I said any nasty things about you behind your back leh. don't have lah. trust me hor? <- ahem. an excellent display of command of singlish to ease the tension.... Calling people nicknames can be really mean too. I remember this incident in lower sec. I used to go home by train with a few classmates. One day, they started to make fun of my name and called me silly nickname. Of cuz, me with the low eq at the tender age of 14, and being so proud of the name my parents bestow upon me, I got really angry. And I wrote a very mean poem and posted on the noticeboard at the back of the class the next day. Perhaps he felt that it was such an insult and we stopped talking ever since. So silly you might think, but when your friend find you annoying and repeatedly ask you to stop, please do so. Anger often propel people to do all sorta stupid things. And this one was really costly. I know I was really mean when I posted that poem. I never really got to apologise, and I want to do so, if he is reading this (impossible lah, so few people read my blog ha ha). Calling nicknames should be only for showing your affection with your darlings and joking among close friends. Of cuz, sometimes I may also be mean to my girlfriend. Brushing her off when she speaks or when she sings. Or telling her off when she does something which I feel she shouldn't. Well, sorry if I come across to you as mean, but I was really concern about you and I could have expressed in a much better way. Will try to talk less and listen more next time. So much said, I shall be less mean from this day onwards. Nevermind what others might say, or behave, its my own actions, which I should be really aware of. ;0)